A thought in the shadow of a sitting dream

I sit there. Sitting beside myself, trying to remind myself what I am. Recalling the past, the mistakes made over the triumphant victories. I wonder of the choices finalized by their completion in futility. Did I make the correct decision? Where did it all go wrong? Theoretically if the beginning was wrong then there also the end will be wrong. Regardless of what transpires in the time between the two points. So, in theory, all choices are completely ineffectual as I will end up exactly wherever it is I started. Then again, this is simply based upon the Circle Theory, as I believe it is called, no matter how far away an object gets away from its beginning; it will always circle back around to that point, completing the circle. So I must ask myself where I began. Do I start at the cold hospital nearly twenty eight years ago? Or perhaps I should try to discover where I truly began. Ah but does it matter where I began all things? For if you were to follow this theory fully, and then you would know where your end would be. To know where you end would be is both a blessing as a curse. For you would know that no matter what you did, you would end someplace else, but to know your end would take the thrill of the unknown out of life, and you would become hollow and worthless.